There’s quite a bit of stigma surrounding a man’s sexual performance. As men, we’re expected to carry quite a bit of weight during the act of sex, and if our guns blast off too soon, for some people, that means game over.
While there are certainly other methods to keep stimulating your partner after the unfortunate event of a premature ending, sometimes you just want to keep things going. For that, there are a number of tips and tricks that we’re going to share with you today.
These tips and tricks have all been tested and have been proven to be effective at making men last longer in bed. Some of them involve your partner (if you have one) and some can be done solo. If you don’t have a partner, practice these tricks daily between now and the time that you find one and you’ll be ready to run a sexual marathon.
1. Train your PC muscle
This is one of the most important fundamental training techniques for all-round sexual performance. Your PC muscle is the same muscle that’s contracted when you have to stop yourself from finishing a pee. Go ahead and flex it now, just to make sure.
If you can’t flex it, wait until the next time you urinate. Cut off the stream and remember the feeling of the muscle as you contract it. This muscle is also related to stopping the flow of ejaculation, and getting to know it will help you become more aware of the sensations prior to ejaculating. You’ll learn to control when and where you ejaculate as you train your kegels.
Then it’s time to do some PC muscle clenches, also known as kegels. This just involves flexing the muscle and holding it – for quite a while; at least thirty seconds. Some people recommend holding your kegels for a minute and a half each!
You’re supposed to do massive numbers of kegel reps – at least a hundred a day – and at thirty seconds a rep, that’s a lot of time spent doing kegels! Fortunately, you can do them anywhere, and you can do them discreetly.
2. The start & stop method
This method works best with a partner, as long as they’re fairly … patient in the bedroom. You should start by yourself, though – this allows you to ease your way into practice.
The trick to this method is simply to fire yourself up until you reach “mid-level excitement,” which is defined by the excessively-named International Society for Sexual Medicine’s Guidelines for the Diagnosis and Treatment of Premature Ejaculation as a level of stimulation and pleasure that doesn’t quite cause ejaculation but is certainly far from baseline.
Once you can identify this stage of stimulation, you just need to stop all stimulation. If you’re with a partner, you can use this time to pleasure her while you wait for the feelings to die down. The idea is that you’ll get more and more used to the sensation so it won’t be as likely to trigger an ejaculation.
3. The squeeze technique
This is basically just a brute-force technique that stops you from ejaculating, which more or less allows you to keep (most of) your erection without spilling your seed and falling into that post-ejaculation state of relaxation.
Uncontrolled studies done on the squeeze method have suggested that it’s very effective, but there haven’t been many clinical studies done on the subject. Regardless, anecdotal evidence supports this idea, and common sense suggests why it works.
The objective of the squeeze technique is to grab the shaft of your penis between your thumb and forefinger. Some grab it around the base, others just beneath the head – you may have to play around with this. Once you find your sweet spot, you’ll notice that squeezing hard enough significantly slows or stops the flow of ejaculation.
4. The Valsalva maneuver
This technique requires a lot of caution! It involves temporarily restricting your airflow. If you seriously cut off your airway during a heightened state of arousal, you could black out and cause yourself serious injury or death.
That said, the Valsalva maneuver has reportedly helped a lot of people with their premature ejaculation. It’s traditionally used to help empty the bladder in people who have difficulty completely draining it – this method is done by taking a breath whilst sitting on the toilet, holding it, leaning forward and bearing down on the breath. This applies pressure and helps to fully empty the bladder.
The same technique can be applied in an attempt to stop premature ejaculation. In fact, I always did this instinctively when doing the squeeze method without realizing that it was a separate technique with its own name!
5. Plan your procreation wisely
There are a few ways that you can plan your sexual encounters and take advantage of certain situations to increase the length of your overall sexual experience.
Masturbate beforehand. If you ejaculate prior to having sex, it will take you longer to do so when you’re actually getting intimate with your partner. It will also take a bit longer for you to get an erection.
Use your refractory period. This is the period which occurs after a guy ejaculates when it’s difficult to get another erection and you’re very sensitive to physical touch. This is a great time to focus on pleasuring your partner with your fingers or mouth. When you’re able to get it up again, you’ll be much less sensitive.
Use condoms that decrease sensation. Some condoms are sprayed with a desensitizer lubricant on the inside that’s activated by heat. This will soak into your erection and greatly decrease the sensation, which might sound unappealing, but for someone suffering from premature ejaculation, a slightly numbed sexual experience still feels fantastic. If you can’t find any condoms with delay lubricant, you can just get extra thick ones. Since these have an impact on sensation for both parties, you may want to find one that’s ribbed or bumped so that there’s extra stimulation for her.