You’ve been in a relationship for a long time, then you might have noticed that there have been some changes to your sex life. This is normal, and occurs to most people at some. During their relationship. If you’re still going strong, and you just want your partner to initiate sex with you more often, this is also normal. If normal for somebody to want their partner to start sex, because it makes them feel wanted and loved.
If your sex life is dying down, and neither of you seem motivated, this article can still help you guys put some new vigor into your sex life. Having sex is a two-way street, and you need to have both parties fully interested for it to be good.
One of the biggest concerns among people in relationships is that their partner is losing interest in them. This isn’t always the case if your partner stops initiating sex with you as often. There are a lot of things that could cause a change in their sexual behaviour, ranging from hormonal changes to stress in their daily lives.
However, there are also a lot of things that you can do that can have a positive influence on their libido and can make them more interested in you. Learning how to do these things tactfully might be exactly what you need to help reinvigorate your sex life. Or, they could be the tips that you need to stop turning your partner off and allow them to return to their regular appreciation of your sexuality.
Don’t expect too much sex just because you’re a couple.
Just because your partner is your partner doesn’t mean that they’re obligated to constantly want to have sex with you, and this is a serious problem that many people face and don’t want to acknowledge because it would make them seem entitled and perverted.
Don’t worry – this is quite a normal expectation. It’s not right, and once you recognize it for what it is, you shouldn’t support it, but it’s not uncommon. You shouldn’t be so put off by yourself that you choose to deny ever doing this, because then you won’t be able to work towards stopping it?
This is one of the biggest ways for your partner to lose their sense of attraction for you. Sexual chemistry is based on mutual desire, tension, and allure. None of this is present when you’re just expecting your partner to want to have sex with you.
Work your self esteem.
Even when you’re in a long-term relationship it’s important that you keep your self esteem in check. “Letting yourself go” doesn’t just apply to your body – it can apply to your personality and your self esteem, as well.
A lot of men tend to lose the charm and intrigue that they used to captivate their partners after they’ve been with them for a while. They begin to think, “oh, well, I’ve already bagged the catch, so now I can just be myself.”
Don’t do this! This will slowly burn out the attraction in your partnership and will leave you with a husk of your prior relationship. It’s important that you feel good about yourself so your partner feels justified in feeling good about being with you.
Communicate well.
If your relationship is dotted with arguments and disagreements, chances are you have some communication problems. These communication errors and negative experiences tend to build up and leave some tension in the relationship – not the good kind, either.
This tension can create a barrier between the expression of your sexual intimacy with your partner. You’ll develop a blanket of apprehension or resentment that covers your sexual desires and soon, the relationship will dwindle.
Start communicating openly and honestly and express any difficulties you have in your current relationship.
Work on non-sexual intimacy.
Partners who are only intimate when they’re having sex tend to have very short-winded relationships. Physical intimacy is a fantastic thing, but restricting it only to sex creates a standard where the rest of the relationship isn’t intimate at all. The only time the two partners get perked up for being close is when they know sex is on the way.
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Physical intimacy can be a great part of your day, pretty much all day. Snuggling at night is a vital component of keeping the two of you emotionally vested in each other. A kiss goodbye before work or school is a great way to keep a bit of sexual tension going while the two of you apart.
Non-sexual touch is also important. Give your partner a bag massage, hold them while you’re watching the waves break. Anything that helps bring the two of you together will help bring your sex life together.
Focus on them!
It’s important that you focus on your partner more than you focus on yourself when you’re actually having sex. This is one of the keys for developing a long lasting, sustainable sexual relationship with somebody that you’re close with.
Also Read: How stress can affect your body
When you focus on your partner, there are a lot of things that you can follow and cues that you can use to progress through the sexual experience. Listen to their breathing, feel their touch, observe the way that they move away from you or towards you when you touch them, feel their heartbeat.
These things can all give you solid indications about whether they’re enjoying the experience or not. This will also allow you to focus less on your own pleasure which means you’ll probably be able to last quite a bit longer than you usually do.
In conclusion
There are a lot of things that you can do to help ensure that your partner wants to keep having sex with you. A lot of these things involve making sure that you give your partner the proper attention that they deserve, and that you don’t focus too much on yourself.
